[ . . . okay. he looks surprised but then he'll just. try really hard? he's trying really hard. you can hear the gears in his brain doing their squeaky little turns]
... then walk me through it?
What is it? I don't think I'm gonna get it if you don't explain at least a little. Sorry.
I keep a lot more from you than I want to.... I know it sucks, to feel like you aren't being trusted with stuff - but a lot of what I get is actually second or third-hand.... so I'm not really allowed to share it out any further than that.
But... it's not because I don't trust you.
I still feel bad about it though - like I'm not doing right by you, the way I want to.
[there was a time, years ago, when he would've been more offended, and he can't deny it still stings sometimes when people lie to his face and admit as much later, but... well, he gets why others wouldn't want to trust him, at least.
(don't people say that if something happens once, you can blame the other party—but if it happens again and again, you're the problem?)]
That's not really the case, I don't think. At least here - I can at least reassure you that I do trust you. If we didn't have to deal with all this murder mystery stuff... it'd be different.
[he would be a lot more giving about what he could say, and he would never have to hide anything from white.
he thinks a lot of things would be different if they didn't meet here, of all places.]
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If it was that straightforward, I would've just fucking said no!
[that the answer isn't simply without a doubt that, as it would be for so many, is what's killing him.]
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... then walk me through it?
What is it? I don't think I'm gonna get it if you don't explain at least a little. Sorry.
[at the end of the day he is still an idiot]
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Making me confess to you weeks ago wasn't enough?
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H-Huh? Are they related?
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[ugggh]
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It's only because I don't really get what you mean otherwise! I just don't wanna misunderstand something important?!
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... Let me ask you this—do you expect anything from me?
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In the way that you say it... Yeah. I do.
I believe in you, and I trust you.
[and that he can say without hesitation]
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white was expecting this, given that mineo had said as much weeks ago and also this prediction was part of white's point to begin with and yet
somehow, he still wasn't? so he just
kind of stands there, not sure what to do with this confirmation.]
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mineo just gives him a smile at that - sincere and amused, even past all the tired - and then he'll just start headed back into the living room.]
Come on, let's at least go sit down.
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You really piss me off.
[but it's not exactly without fondness.]
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[but he will go to sit]
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anyway. he will also go sit and. not look at mineo.]
Yeah. Fuckin' sap.
[...]
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but sure they can go to the loft on the couch where they kissed now that jan suggested it]
.... what were you expecting me to say?
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... I don't know.
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... I just don't know what other answer I could've given...
[it felt
obvious?]
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Shouldn't that at least be something you think about first?
[especially if that belief is placed in someone like white.
he knows what he's like. it isn't as if there's no reason that, in his long life, only one other person has ever expressed that kind of faith in him.]
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Why? I told you weeks ago that I trust you - that means I trust you with everything. I'm not really good at doing stuff in half-measures...
And you haven't let me down so far. If anything, I feel like I've let you down...
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Why the hell would you think that?
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I keep a lot more from you than I want to.... I know it sucks, to feel like you aren't being trusted with stuff - but a lot of what I get is actually second or third-hand.... so I'm not really allowed to share it out any further than that.
But... it's not because I don't trust you.
I still feel bad about it though - like I'm not doing right by you, the way I want to.
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his gaze returns back to a random point, rather than at mineo.]
Don't feel about that. I'm used to it, anyway.
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Not much to be done about it, right?
[there was a time, years ago, when he would've been more offended, and he can't deny it still stings sometimes when people lie to his face and admit as much later, but... well, he gets why others wouldn't want to trust him, at least.
(don't people say that if something happens once, you can blame the other party—but if it happens again and again, you're the problem?)]
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That's not really the case, I don't think. At least here - I can at least reassure you that I do trust you. If we didn't have to deal with all this murder mystery stuff... it'd be different.
[he would be a lot more giving about what he could say, and he would never have to hide anything from white.
he thinks a lot of things would be different if they didn't meet here, of all places.]
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