... I know you got lectured a lot. And even if it's because people care, it still sucks to have them kicking your ass when you were just trying to help. I'm not taking back what I said, or being mad. [because he thinks he was right to be]
But I can still check on if you're okay after all that.
[god. mineo always has a way of guilting him into this, even if it's unintentional.]
... I dunno, just—
[...]
If this had happened back with the other Demans and I'd somehow managed to get myself poisoned, the others probably would've laughed and told me I deserved it, so this feels really fucking weird, I guess!
[he can't squish the bit of warmth that blossoms, although it's accompanied by a sense of relief that mineo didn't see certain memories.
he shrugs.]
Shitty workplace cultures. What can you do?
[except in this case, his "workplace" was the only home he'd known for over a hundred years, and his "coworkers" the closest thing to a (fucked up, disloyal) family.
he can't say he felt any real grief over their deaths, and that's as someone who cared more about his fellow demans than most of them ever did.]
[ . . . . . he kind of gets it. sort of. it's hard to say, when even mineo's team - for all that they used to dismiss him - would still give him grief like a bunch of older brothers or uncles.]
.... I'm glad you got out of it.
Don't let anybody treat you like that again. Or if they do, I'll kick their ass before you can even get to them.
[... and there it is, that warmth again. you deserve better, mineo had once said, and for all that white has always wanted better out of his life, the notion that he deserves it is something he still has to wrap his head around.]
I'm just saying that there's nothing wrong with needing to sit with your thoughts for a while! You clearly have them, so you should get to have time with them!
... A little surprised you don't have anything better to do right now, to be honest.
[when mineo hunted him down for the lecture, white can't say this is how he expected the conversation to turn out. then again, considering the kind of person mineo is (and why, as white's unfortunately reminded, he developed dokis in the first place), maybe he should've.]
... trying to find who cursed Aoi-san and Shi-san. If that person did it to protect Law-san, that means Ashiya-san might've killed Omi-san. If they didn't.... they really might've been Omi-san's killer.
Or just a chaotic asshole.
Just wanna know what we're still dealing with, I guess.
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[he nudges white's foot with his own again]
Try again.
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[... he knows, but.]
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[ . . . he tilts his head.]
... I know you got lectured a lot. And even if it's because people care, it still sucks to have them kicking your ass when you were just trying to help. I'm not taking back what I said, or being mad. [because he thinks he was right to be]
But I can still check on if you're okay after all that.
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I'm fine.
[though what he won't say is that people getting angry out of caring cuts him in a way that being mad for literally any other reason never did.]
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It's okay if you're not.
I wanna know what you're thinking.... if you'll trust me with it.
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... I dunno, just—
[...]
If this had happened back with the other Demans and I'd somehow managed to get myself poisoned, the others probably would've laughed and told me I deserved it, so this feels really fucking weird, I guess!
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scowls]
I didn't think I could want to punch people I've never met so much before.
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he shrugs.]
Shitty workplace cultures. What can you do?
[except in this case, his "workplace" was the only home he'd known for over a hundred years, and his "coworkers" the closest thing to a (fucked up, disloyal) family.
he can't say he felt any real grief over their deaths, and that's as someone who cared more about his fellow demans than most of them ever did.]
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.... I'm glad you got out of it.
Don't let anybody treat you like that again. Or if they do, I'll kick their ass before you can even get to them.
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Trust me, I don't plan on it.
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Good.
[ . . . . ]
But I can get... how the difference might be something that you need to sit with for a while.
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Tch! You don't need to act like I'm fragile, you know.
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I'm not, stupid!
I'm just saying that there's nothing wrong with needing to sit with your thoughts for a while! You clearly have them, so you should get to have time with them!
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This coming from the nerd...!
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as in. more than he was already looking away.]
Shut up! So what if I am...?
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.... so I can either leave you alone with them if you need time on your own -
Or I can sit with you while you deal with them. It's up to you.
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You can stay. I guess.
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... we don't have to talk if you don't want to.
But if there's anything you want another person to hear, I'll be listening.
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[when mineo hunted him down for the lecture, white can't say this is how he expected the conversation to turn out. then again, considering the kind of person mineo is (and why, as white's unfortunately reminded, he developed dokis in the first place), maybe he should've.]
dw my notif
.... had to go check on something else first, for the investigation. Ran into a dead end.
[because mineo does tend to focus on work first - even if he was mad at white, he had to follow a lead.
but.]
But what's wrong with letting you have all my attention when we're together?
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What was the lead?
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Or just a chaotic asshole.
Just wanna know what we're still dealing with, I guess.
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But I have to try.
[he's too stubborn for his own good]
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